Margaret, I know you haven’t seen the book , but the jacket cover has a picture of Ann Coulter in a pretty, black dress with her hands on her hips looking like she is ready for a fight. Well, having finished Chapter 3, I have determined I can take her skinny ass.
They say that given enough time, a hypothetical chimpanzee typing at random would, as part of its output, almost surely produce one of Shakespeare’s plays. If that is true, then two monkey’s typing for ten minutes could have produced this book and Tom Daschle’s tax returns with plenty of time left over to pose for the picture on the jacket cover.
Basically Ann uses 38 pages to suggest that there is no such thing as negative political ads from the Republican party. Evidently Republicans can only tell the truth and no Democrat has ever served their country honorably in the armed forces. Seriously. This woman argues that there is no Republican Attack Machine and then goes on for 12 pages talking about how successful the Swift Boat Veterans were at attacking John Kerry. The reason Democrats lose elections is because the Republicans point out the truth, but the reason Democrats win elections is because Republicans are never allowed to point out the truth. Sound confusing? Welcome to the world Ann Coulter.
Did anybody out there know that Barack Obama was loosely tied to a terrorist named Bill Ayers? Really? Because Ann was dissappointed that the story never got out. By the way, according to Ann, if you follow the trail far enough Obama can be linked to Charles Manson. It would have come out in the election but the liberal media squashed it.
The entire chapter reads like the diary of a mad woman who wants us first to believe that the “liberal-biased media” is all-powerful while simultaneously claiming that Fox News is the most popular news source ever. Kind of the way those kind-hearted Republicans wanted us to believe that Obama was a Muslim who attended a really horrible Christian church.
I have to admit. I really do understand how people can easily get caught up in this line of reasoning. I do it all the time when I try to convince myself that the size of my ass has nothing do with the amount of pie I ate. But no matter how hard Ann wants to argue there is no Republican Attack Machine, the fact is the Republican Attack Machine has big feet and I have a big ass.
The more I see Ann Coulter on talk shows, the more I realize you can judge this book by its actual cover. If you take off the book jacket to reveal the cover, there is no picture – just the author’s name and the title. Ann Coulter – Guilty. I guess the jury is in.
Well Margaret, I will continue reading until I have finished even if it kills me. But I have managed to put down the book long enough to catch the news. It appears that Obama doesn’t walk on water. He actually admitted that he made a mistake in handling the nomination of Tom Daschle as his health and human services secretary. Can you believe that? A President who admits he made a mistake when he makes it rather than years later when he is leaving office and trying to fabricate a legacy. It gives me hope that whoever classified Ann’s books as nonfiction will one day also admit their mistake.
So that is the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I mean it. Really.
[...] Anne Coulter “writes books,” whines that she’s being boycotted by the tv networks she denigrates in her books, and then denies the whole episode when she’s back on to plug her book. (She also derides people who deride conservatives, even though she derides conservatives in her book, but that’s another story altogether) [...]
By: The Cost of Free Speech « Spreading the Word on March 3, 2009
at 12:16 AM
Here is the Republican Plan for the US.
Interesting: Seems like the plan I have been witnessing.
http://www.hoolinet.com/CurrentEvents/TheRepublicanPlanforAmerica/tabid/430/Default.aspx
HELP AN ALASKA VILLAGE! Palin won’t so you and I need to do it! The Yukon River is frozen through May. Help will be needed for a few more months.
http://anonymousbloggers.wordpress.com/another-village-in-need-of-help/
By: JuneauJoe Δ on February 14, 2009
at 1:20 PM
As always, thanks for the laughs (and the truths). They should pay you to write this stuff for TV.
By: steadycat on February 14, 2009
at 12:54 PM
But do you think that the fact that Coulter is a cross-dressing man has any effect on her thinking. Like, being disappointed with Nature and the real world?
By: elfuente on February 12, 2009
at 2:56 PM
my problem with AC is that, like Limbaugh, people continue to pay attention to them. In some ways, the more we sensible folk rage about their idiocies, the more people pay attention to them. The more attention paid to them, the greater credence they are given. The more money they make, and the more outrageous crap they spout. When I go to Costco, and I see a bunch of AC books (or O’Reilly, or any other radical right blowhard)…I bury them–usually with whatever lefty book I can find. If people don’t see them, people won’t buy them. If people don’t buy them…well…you’re smart people…you know where this is headed. STOP PAYING ATTENTION TO THESE NUT JOBS! It only serves to validate them. Besides…they’re not worth it…really…there are far more important things to worry about.
By: Tom on February 9, 2009
at 12:56 PM
An Ann Coulter Song by Hoolinet:
Loud Annie
(To the tune of “Proud Mary” by Creedence Clearwater Revival)
Got a good job with no real work
Attacking liberals every night and day
But I never lost a minute of sleepin’
Worryin’ bout the way the real world is
Chorus:
Big mouth it just keep flappin’
Ann Coulter keeps on yappin’
Hidin’, hidin’, hiding from the real world
Clinton was a commie liberal
Ignore what he did for the economy
But I never knew what liberals were all traitors
Til I stopped and read this lunatic queen
(Chorus)
If women have careers not babies
Ann Coulter just calls them sick feminists
She don’t have to worry, thought she’s got no babies
Those who think like her just never get it
(Chorus)
Courtesy Mark Hoolihan and the Hoolinet
Copyright © 2003 Boniface Bugle Productions. All Rights Absurd.
By: JuneauJoe Δ on February 8, 2009
at 9:18 AM
GW on the Iraq War: Give him a little space and W can think.
http://www.hoolinet.com/CurrentEvents/BushSaysIraqWarWorthwhile/tabid/394/Default.aspx
By: JuneauJoe Δ on February 8, 2009
at 9:12 AM
TRADESMAN: BIG: When you brought it up, I discarded it as voodoo economics and still do, but here is why.
All the 800 Billion or so will be spent within 4 years and then it is gone. To just give everyone money for mortgage, food, car, etc, the economy will come crashing down again in 4 years. If you spend that money on tuition, rebuiliding roads/ bridges, rebuilding electric and/or computer grid, alternative energy, mass transit, hybrid cars, insulating houses etc, you get training & jobs and a way to move the country forward for another period of time.
If you just give people money, we still have bridges ready to fall, dependence on the middle east for oil, inefficient buses and cars but we paid bills for 5 years.
I read about BIG twice but it just did not make sense to me.
By: JuneauJoe Δ on February 8, 2009
at 8:33 AM
Google Ann’s images and look at her hands…
It’s a treat.
By: kavips on February 8, 2009
at 4:18 AM
Just had to let you know how much I enjoy your writing style. I am still mulling over the fact that perhaps it WAS the pie that made my ass fill out the chair so nicely. Thank you for reading the Ann C garbage and reporting to us, I find myself compelled to read your thoughts on the book, kind of like slowing down to look at a car wreck.
By: redtoblue on February 7, 2009
at 11:41 AM
A book on libraries that I had to read for class once started with this:
“It has been said that a million monkeys at computers could eventually produce the works of Shakespear. The Internet has proven this to not be true.”
I just love that!! Had to post it!
Anyway, the comments here are just as great as the blog post. Some funny, some mad, some just oenry.
By: Melissa on February 6, 2009
at 3:56 PM
I’m not sure it is worth it to devote any more energy toward Coulter and her ideas, but your recaps are hilarious.
Once you’re finished with the book, can you write something that will help us detox?
By: AG on February 6, 2009
at 11:50 AM
Greytdog,
I was probably referring to the walking pole which is what I’m using while my hip/leg recovers. It is similar to the nordic ski pole. It does help maintain balance whereas the walkers and canes throw you out of balance.
skyewriter
I commend you for reading the stimilus bill. You should keep us informed as I certainly don’t have the ability to download that many pages with dial-up.
Hi Jean,
Welcome back. I’ve never heard the song but my Mother’s favorite jello recipe was lime jello, marshmallow, cottage cheese surprise.
I am now a full member of the gummy club and wish I had some jello surprise right now during recovery.
American
I love the paper on Hell. Got to pass that one along. If it’s not a “real” paper it should have been.
By: Raji Δ on February 6, 2009
at 6:05 AM
Morning all – here’s yet another point of view on the economic shenanigans from our nation’s capital where the business of Congress is conducted against the voting public:
‘Centrist’ Economic Recovery Package Disproportionately Cuts Programs For Women And Children
By Amanda Terkel on Feb 5th, 2009 at 4:45 pm
‘Centrist’ Economic Recovery Package Disproportionately Cuts Programs For Women And Children»
Conservatives opposed to the Democratic economic recovery package have been voicing their complaints by calling out individual programs they believe to be wasteful. For example, last month on the House bill, conservatives specifically targeted funding for comprehensive family planning services and STD prevention. Unfortunately, in an effort to compromise, President Obama called for both of those provisions to be cut from the legislation.
Today, various progressive blogs released a list of items that so-called “centrist” Sens. Susan Collins (R-ME) and Ben Nelson (D-NE) have proposed cutting from the economic recovery package. Many of these cuts, however, would disproportionately affect women and children — similar to the cuts to the House bill. Some highlights:
– $150 million cut to the Violence Against Women Act
– $50 million to the Victims of Crime Act
– $25 million to the Internet Crimes Against Children Task Forces
– $1.1 billion to Head Start
– $50 million to Teacher Quality Partnership Grants
– $5.2 billion for Prevention And Wellness (including diabetes screening and HIV testing)
– $13.9 billion for Pell Grants
– $2 billion for Child Care Development Block Grants
Over on the Wonk Room, Pat Garofalo notes why these cuts are so troubling:
For Nelson, who has a personal net worth about $10 million, this is also a case of kicking Main Street while its down, as the proposed cuts are in areas like health care, education, and aid to the states. Adding insult to injury, Collins and Nelson are nitpicking important stimulus funding that would benefit working Americans and their children, after they voted for giving $700 billion to Wall St. with no oversight.
In particular, health care provisions not only disproportionately boost women and children, but also minorities. After all, preventive health care spending is stimulative; it creates jobs and saves the country expensive long-term medical costs.
President Obama put it best today when he criticized all the people who are calling anything besides tax cuts “pork”: “So when you hear these attacks deriding something of such obvious importance as this, you have to ask yourself, ‘Are these folks serious?’”
http://thinkprogress.org/
By: Greytdog Δ on February 6, 2009
at 5:38 AM
Thank you so much for reading this book so I don’t have to! (not that I would anyway). I’ll be passing your blog around, is that OK?
By: Judith Inge on February 6, 2009
at 3:23 AM