I thought I was done. Really I did. Obama won. Bush is almost gone. I was ready to sit back and enjoy the ride. Damn it to hell. She’s back. One day she’s standing in front of a dying turkey talking about how she needs to get back to the business of running Alaska and the next day she’s making plans to head on down to Georgia to campaign for that devil, Chambliss.
You see Chambliss is the guy who won the Georgia Senate seat from Max Cleland a few years back. Now pay attention folks because this is important. Chambliss suggested that Cleland was soft on homeland security. Cleland, of course, is a war hero – one who came home from war with three less limbs than when he began. Yep. Cleland lost an arm and both legs in defense of his country, but Chambliss defeated him with ads suggesting he didn’t have the courage to protect us from terrorists.
So Chambliss is an ass. That’s a given. His opponent in this run-off election is Mr. Martin. Now Martin has all of his limbs so Chambliss is not sure how to attack him. So he called in the Republican attack dog… a certain pitt bull in lipstick who apparently has more political lives than a pitt cat. Heads up folks. Sarah Palin is back and my heart goes out to all our dear friends over there in Georgia. She’s sort of like headlice. You can’t just shampoo your hair. You have to boil everything afterwards.
But let me tell you why I am up on my soap box again so quickly, because I really did plan to relax at least until after the turkey had digested. The other night we were visiting with neighbors at a kind of pre-holiday block party. By the way, if you don’t know your neighbors, you should. People live right next door to complete strangers these days and that just isn’t right. Neighbors should be part of your extended family. Life was better when we all knew our neighbors. But I digress.
At this little gathering I met a couple of idiots who live around the corner from us – couple of morons who still have the McCain/Palin sticker on the back of their car. Here is just a few of the quotes from the evening:
“We are just so worried about what is going to happen to the country now that a Muslim is President.”
“William Ayers raised a lot of money for Obama’s campaign and now Obama owes him a lot of favors.”
“Did you know that no one has been able to prove that he actually graduated from Harvard?”
Trust me, that was just a sampling. I asked them where they had heard this load of crap and I got various references to Limbaugh and Fox News. Complete and utter idiots. I wanted to tell them to sit down and shut the hell up, but they are neighbors. So before I left I told them if they wanted to live in fear that was their choice, but when they were ready to rejoin society do drop by for a piece of pie.
When I got back home, I made the mistake of watching the news. Now I don’t know what Margaret thinks about this because she is visiting family and probably hasn’t turned on the boob tube even once. But when I heard that Sarah Palin will be heading to Georgia to campaign for Chambliss… Well Sarah Palin is not my neighbor. And the last time I checked Alaska was a long way from Georgia. So I hope my friends in Georgia will join me in saying, “Governor Palin, sit down and shut the hell up.”
And while I am on the soap box:
Rush Limbaugh has had the mic entirely too long. For years he has kept this country divided with hate speech and lies. Quite frankly he probably has done more to harm this country than even George Bush. He is neither funny nor relevant anymore. And have you listened to the morons who call into his show? Poor man has to pander to idiots day in and day out. His open mic Friday must be pure torture. OxyContin is a powerful pain pill. Is there any doubt why he would need it so desperately? Together we should all tell him and his callers to sit down and shut the hell up.
Same goes for Ann Coulter. Have you read any of her books. I read a few pages of her last one and it made me wonder if she ever actually went to school. My daughter is a teacher and the kids in her second grade class can write better than that. Ann’s an idiot who also needs to sit down and shut the hell up. And while you’re at it, Ann, cross your legs. Nobody needs to see that.
Sean Hannity is a waste of the time it took me to type this sentence. Sit down and shut the hell up, Sean. Winning in a debate against Alan Colmes is like Michael Phelps lapping me in the pool. This is the best Fox News can give us each evening? Shameful. Just shameful.
Elisabeth Hasselbeck. Well, actually I have nothing to say because I am pretty sure no one is listening to her anymore. I wonder what rat tastes like when it comes back up?
Take a hint from your leader. Bush has pretty much checked out. Of course that assumes he had ever really checked in. But my point is that Obama isn’t President yet and he already seems to be running the show. Thank God.
So Sean, Ann, Rush, Sarah et al. I am not asking for you to give up even a single limb for your country… just your tongue. We’ve heard enough of your crap. We’re ready to move on to better days and smarter people.
I hope everyone had a nice Thanksgiving, and I am sorry if this rant ruined your holiday. I mean it. Really.